Living the Dream?

While I was at work today, I overheard my boss use the expression, “living the dream”. This is an expression that I hear a lot, and I’m slightly confused at to what it’s supposed to mean. Most of the time, people say it in a somewhat sarcastic or facetious way. When somebody says it in that manner, it seems to me that they are saying that their life is less than interesting.

For example, you see a friend you haven’ t seen in a while, and they ask you what you have been doing. A common response in this scenario can be that you’re “just living the dream”. This response seems to be said when someone feels they don’t have anything too noteworthy to report. Now, I may be reading into this statement wrong, but that seems to be the underlying meaning of the statement. You know, they aren’t doing anything that exciting, just going to school, going to work, dating, blah, blah, blah.

It’s funny because I’ve heard this statement in conjunction with the lifestyle of a college grad that still lives in Provo. As I’ve tried to explain to people what I’ve been doing, my friends have sometimes pointed out that I’m just “living the dream”. Basically implying that I’m doing nothing with my life by still living in Provo.

So, why is “living the dream” not a good thing? Don’t all of us hope that we’ll go after and achieve our dreams? I think that most of us do. However, “the dream” is often associated with societal norms and expectations that we’ve been raised with all of our lives. So yes, “living the dream” should be a negative statement, because if we’re living “THE dream”, we’re not living our own.

My dream is not to graduate from college and go work for a big corporation in New York, Boston, or D.C. My dream is not to find a “career”, and work for somebody else for my entire life. My dream is not to go to medical school, law school, dental school, or get my MBA. My dream does not align with a lot of the normal, predictable, and expected post-graduation plans of college grads. So, when I say I’m “living the dream”, I’m doing just that. I’m not doing what I want to do, rather, I’m doing what I’ve been taught I should want to do.

That’s really why I’m going on this trip. Too many people settle for “living the dream”, because it just seems too risky or scary to go after what they really want. Even then, often times people have a hard time deciphering between what they really want and what they’ve been taught they should want. I kept quitting jobs without having any other plan, because I never wanted to just get comfortable and settle for life. I hear people all the time say that they don’t love their job, “but it pays the bills”. That, to me, is living the dream.

So, are you living the dream?

8 Comments

• 

  By Russ, December 3, 2009 @ 10:21 pm

  It is great to be brave enough to actually live YOUR dream.

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  By Aaron Anderson, December 4, 2009 @ 10:41 am

  Well, I don’t think being a nomad is necessarily my dream. But, it is a dream of mine to travel around the country. Rather than waiting till I have money, which is what most people do, I’ll make an adventure of it.

  My main dream is to be a successful entrepreneur, and if I didn’t think this trip would help me get there, I wouldn’t be doing it.

• 

  By Russ, December 4, 2009 @ 3:17 pm

  I didn’t mean the hitchhiking was the dream, it is only the beginning of your dream. This is your approach, even though other people might not be able to see why you would take this path.

  I saw a recent book, “Pros and Cons of Hitchhiking: A Guide for Entrepreneurs.” A reviewer said, “This is a great book for new entrepreneurs who want to learn about the common pitfalls of starting a business.”

  Another book, “Riding with Stranger” gives some similar sentiments.

  “Hitchhiking is an exercise in faith, and the more you trust it, the more it rewards you. . . . Faith is a beautiful thing, if it give you strength to do what you know you should do anyway. The more certain I am that if I take the less secure and more adventurous course the rides will arrive, the better my experiences on the road. It is not easy to keep that faith, and I freely concede that I have gotten a little rusty, a little too prone to stick to the well-traveled highways–but I count it a victory that after all these years I am out here at all. And what holds true on roads of tar and asphalt holds equally true on the metaphorical roads of our lives. How many of my friends, in various ways, decided it was more sensible to buy that bus ticket–signing on for a career that would carry them on a set route to a prescribed destination–and then saw their bus break down and found themselves one day out on the roadside, at a time and place they did not choose?” (p. 43-44)

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  By Candace, December 6, 2009 @ 7:09 am

  Interesting take on “living the dream,” Aaron!

  To answer your question, YES, I am absolutely living MY personal dream. Yes, it is true that MY dream “is often associated with societal norms and expectations that we’ve been raised with all of our lives,” but the life I am now living IS what I have always wanted.

• 

  By Aaron Anderson, December 6, 2009 @ 11:08 am

  Candace,

  That’s awesome. I’m glad that you know you’re doing what you love. I haven’t been able to figure my life out as early as you, but hopefully I’ll be able to say what you can say pretty soon.

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  By Candace, December 6, 2009 @ 8:35 pm

  Good thing the “life game” isn’t a race, right??! There isn’t a black and white right or wrong timing for everyone. I sincerely hope this adventure you are embarking on will give you the answers you seek for living your dream.

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  By Matt, December 8, 2009 @ 8:53 am

  I wrote a response but it accidentally got deleted. I love you buddy and hope you can find your dream. I have always dreamed of becoming a husband and father and am so excited to start a family.

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  By Brook, December 20, 2009 @ 10:07 am

  Amen! You nailed it. Live your dream, not the (society’s)dream—best post I’ve read on your blog.

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